Something extremely terrifying happened to me yesterday. Something so unimaginable that it scares me almost as bad as spiders. Just the mere thought of it has my skin crawling and my breakfast trying to work its way back up. I realized that I don't want to stay single forever. I realized that even though Dick did a number, I still had love to give. But to do that, I will eventually have to date again. Date again? Ugh!Dating sucks donkey balls! I've never been a fan of the butterflies in you stomach as it just makes me want to puke. I hate the whole putting on that people do -- saying things they don't really mean and only doing so because they think it's what you want to hear. The half-ass compliments that are only uttered in an ill attempt to woo you. The whole to kiss or not to kiss? To sex or not to sex? And of course, the weeding out of the guys who are obviously just trying to get in your pants.
Oh god. What will I wear? Do these jeans make my ass look even bigger? Why is he late? Why didn't he call? When will he call? I wonder if I just offended him? What is that smell? I wonder if he likes me? Is he telling the truth? Why does he keep twitching like that? Was it something I said?
I am not looking forward to having to go through all that again. I'd rather stick my head in the toilet and allow my children to plunge away. Seriously. Year number two from my five year plan is looking more and more appealing after all.
3 comments:
Signorina - I think anyone who has followed your blog for any length of time realises that you have a lot to give and to offer; you're intelligent, caring and a great deal of fun. Yes, dating isn't always fun, but at the same time there is all the adventure of exploration in meeting someone new; furthermore, you will find that many of your fears were inordinate, as they generally belong to women who don't know what they want. Indecisive is not an accusation that could be laid successfully at your door.
If you have an active life a potential partner will come around on it's own. Forcing the situation by actively dating various people is not something I would do. I do enjoy the single life though (at least, I would if I wasn't tied down and unable to let go of my lovely GF) and the 'hitting on', the 'hunt' if you will, is pretty fun to me. However age is a big factor here and since you have children I doubt you'd enjoy it at all :P.
@Green Curmudgeon: I thank you so much for the kind words. The are truly appreciated.
@Robin: Having children and the baggage of a previous marriage makes dating all the more difficult. I'm not looking forward to any of it.
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