The Boy had a project due for school and he needed a box to accomplish this task. Me, being the good little Suzie that I am, decided the best place to find one would be in the garage. I start going through the massive mound of boxes that have been collected since Dick started ordering parts for his new car. I had almost given up hope on finding an empty one when I picked up one that finally felt light. I took the top off and couldn't believe what I saw.There in the box, stacked ever so neatly, were five issues of Victoria's Secret catalogs.
Now, I know I hadn't put them there and my kids never get the mail, so this had to be of Dick's doing. This would actually explain a lot. If you recall, we haven't been doing much lately, so the Vicki girls must be getting all the action.
Now I'm pissed! My blood has been boiling ever since and I spent half the evening figuring out how I should handle the situation. I think I've finally devised a plan. I am going to replace the catalogs with pictures of my ex-boyfriends. I will then put them in the box along with a mighty handsome dildo and a tube of lube. Oh, to see the look on his face when he makes the discovery! Priceless.
2 comments:
I see a slight flaw in your plan: it presumes you're going to be around to see him open his stash, but you being around means he won't open it in front of you.
What you could do is simply get rid of the catalogues and replace them with LL Bean ones. If he starts erm, "seeking relief" with women in parkas, then you know he's got issues.
@GreenCurmudgeon: I've already installed the nanny cam so I'll get to see the look on his face, but I do like the LL Bean idea. Too funny.
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